Ode To A Piece of Shit

You are a disgusting excuse for a human being. You are the kind of human who wallows in their mediocrity, dangling false ambitions of grandeur in front of your eyes just to paint the illusion you will or can someday excel beyond the stagnant pool of waste that is your existence. Your kind is not unfamiliar but an epidemic among youth who waste away their age and minds on frivolous, debilitating distractions that keep you all rooted in the sty that is the world around you in which you have created. You live, eat, breath and fuck in mounds of shit piled so high that all you’ve ever known is shit. You were born amongst shit and you will most likely die a meaningless existence in the same shit and that makes you nothing more but a piece of shit.

But it is not good enough that most of the world you live in is shit, you have to spend your life dragging others down into the shit with you. In your jealousy, in your subconscious envy you live an incomplete life and therefore will cling onto any small glittering object that shows the smallest signs of promise and deceive yourself enough to believe that one anomaly will save you from your insignificance. But in the obesity of your squalor you draw that beauty down into the mire and destroy something so pure, so rare that in your vanity you make excuses for your actions just to avoid the otherwise fiery guilt suffered by such fools.

Fuck you. As kind and gentle as I was for so long, you fed me nothing but shit. But now I think I'll vomit a year's worth of shit right back on top of you and see how you like it when the one you loved the most exercises their power to mutilate your existence.

I have forgiven you for abuses inflicted on me even though the reverberations will be felt years from now. You have left scars, brand marks of your handy work in many different ways, though I will not give you the satisfaction of leaving those scars visible. I forgave you for the infidelity, for the lies and for the foolish games. I forgave you for the eight months of my life you wasted. But if there is one thing I will not forgive you for, it is for the continuous effort to hurt not just me but the people in my life. In your insecurities and also your vanity, you conjured excuses to suit the fancy of your conclusions to destroy that which was beautiful. You do not know of what beauty is, you do not know the privilege of being alive. You do not know how to appreciate the excellence bestowed upon you. You do not know how to love. You will never know how to love. You think love is a commodity that can be bought and paid for. In your youthful ignorance, you will never understand true love – unconditional, forgiving, nonjudgmental, selfless, and pure. And so you will lead a miserable life, pretending you know what love is to lure others into a false sense of security. You take life for granted and everything in it, always being unsatisfied with your life even though so many in the world are worse off than you.

To me, you never existed. I fell in love with a lie. I thought that lie was the real person and that the miserable, selfish, destructive villain before me was just temporary. Now I know I was deceived. Now I can finally say I am thankful my life turned out this way and you are not in it. I am thankful he came into my life as one hour with him was worth more to me than this entire year of your emotional cruelty. I am thankful for the companions I found who helped me as long as they could before you burnt everything to the ground with your narcissism. The embarrassment, the loss of friendship and the destruction of beauty is my burden to bear now and I will never make the same mistake again of lowering my standards to accommodate a wreckage of a human being.

Congratulations you son of a bitch.

I hope you rot in the hell you so strongly believe in.

That way maybe your environment would reflect your misery as the shit you live in is only the shit you create and you are and never will be anything better than an apprehensive misogynist, fatefully mediocre and covered to the top with shit.